Cole’s Miscellany (Part Seven)

  • One of Jennifer’s bedtime stories last night, Elmer and the Rainbow, was new to me. I’m a big fan of the Elmer books and this one didn’t let me down: “Some things you can give and give and not lose any. Things like happiness or love or my colours”. I’ll take a sentimental patchwork elephant with a positive message like that any day of the week over a certain selfish swine not worth her salt.
  • Before Squattergate kicked off, Leo had never slept at the Rents’ house but Jennifer regularly invited herself here for sleepovers. They both slept here for my first two nights in hospital. On the third night, even though I was still in hospital, Graham was keen for Jennifer to sleep at home to bring a semblance of normality to her life. She was not massively keen on the idea to start with but devastation set in when she realised that the plan was for Leo to remain at Grandma’s. No prizes for guessing where she slept that night after she asked: “is Leo taking my place?”.
  • There have been quite a few logistics to sort out as a result of the Immigrant, which have required a fair few forms to be completed. I’ve found the “One Size Fits All” forms infuriating (and, at times, impossible to answer truthfully) as my pedantry makes me uncomfortable ticking the “best fit” box when it is potentially misleading or incomplete. I’ve spent a lot of time over the last few weeks mentally redesigning the travel insurance claim and DVLA notification forms, in particular. I was considering a sideline in redesigning forms to simplify them, not because I thought it would be remotely lucrative but it would make me sleep better at night. Of course, insurance companies don’t want to make it easier for people to make claims, so that’s the end of that sideline before I’ve even got started.
  • It probably won’t come as a surprise that this article struck a chord with me. Bring it on!
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